Steps In Assertive Negotiation


1. State how you feel about the problem or behaviour and describe what about it violates your rights or disturbs you. You may say:

- I feel frustrated when....

- It hurts me when......

- I feel unhappy when....

- I dont like it when....

- Ifeel.... when....




2. Make your request by clearly stating what you would like to have happen. You may say:

- I would like it better if....

- Please do not.....

- I would like you to....

- I wish you would.....

- Could you please....



3. Invite the other person to express his/her feelings or thoughts about your request. You may say:

- How do you feel about that?

- Is that O. K. with you?

- What do you think?

- What are your thoughts on that?

- Is that all right with you?




4. Accept with thanks if the other person agrees with your request. Saying "thanks" is a good way to end the discussion. You may say:

- Thank you.

- Great, I appreciate that.

- I'm happy that it is okay with you.

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